The Ultimate Conspiracy Part I– Guest Post by Ianto Watt

My goodness, there seems to be a lot of cats running around! And a whole lot of empty bags lying about as well. It reminds one of the ‘As I was Going To St. Ives‘ riddle, in reverse. There, no one could see the question because of all the bags they could see. Today, no one can see the bag at all. Let alone the cats.

And it seems a number of people have presumed I have fallen prey to the assumption that there is only one world-wide conspiracy among men, when in fact there are many. Please, let me dis-abuse them of this thought, for I would agree. Not only is there the Russian (a.k.a. Communist) conspiracy to enslave all mankind, there are also innumerable others. Let me count just a few of the ways: the Illuminati, the Rosicrucians, the Free Masons, the Bilderbergers, the Jews, the Tri-Lateral Commission, the Jesuits, and of course, Wal-Mart. My money is on Wal-Mart. Yet each and every one is real, and yet each has fallen short of its goal. But not for lack of effort and guile. And remember, there is still time left on the clock. And each contestant is still theoretically in reach of its goal. And so the turmoil continues.

But that’s not really the point, is it? The real point is this: that mankind, as a whole, seethes with individuals and groups who would attempt to realize their dream of total control over all mankind. Whether it is financial, political, social or religious, this desire seems to be endemic to the species. And equally evident is the fact that each attempt, in some fashion, has been revealed by someone, somewhere. And each of those who reveals this ‘secret cabal’ is convinced that they have unmasked the ultimate group, and the penultimate plan. The big cat, in other words.

Now those who pooh-pooh the brave souls who have revealed these various conspiracies like to presume that while mankind may be predisposed to these sorts of efforts, they comfort themselves with the thought that the multiplicity of these competing efforts will, in fact, cancel each other out in the grand scheme of time and fate. And thus they may, with a whiff of pseudo-intellectual superiority, dismiss all of these Little Dutch Boys who are convinced that they have plugged the one truly important hole in the dike.
Furthermore, these skeptics like to assume that each of these conspiracies is incapable of remaining totally hidden from public view, at least for the time needed to effect their plan. Because, after all, each of these plans has been revealed in some fashion, in some period of time, ergo, the plan must fail. After all, once public scrutiny is focused upon each particular group, their apparent effectiveness evaporates, eh?

And so, we are back to my assertion that there exists a human conspiracy that is both multi-generational and secretive, and that this plan seems to be impervious to the effects of public scrutiny. This plan, for lack of a better term, I shall call The Russian Plan. And no, I do not equate the word ‘Russian’ with the term ‘Communist’, although the Communist Internationale (Komintern) is still the current vehicle for their efforts outside of Russia. But inside Russia, there seems to be a resurgence of the Old Autocracy. A new Tsar, a new Vladimir the Great, seems to have arisen. And we must ask, first, are all the Romanovs really dead? And next, the more important question; is this Russian Plan still in effect? And is it still in league with its Komrades from the Komintern? After all, how could Monarchists work in concert with Marxists? Is this even remotely possible, you ask? To which I must answer, Yes. And here is where the minds diverge.

Allow me to explain. I am not attempting to alert the world to a human attempt to enslave all mankind to Russian domination. I am simply saying that those (Russians) who hold to this ideal of world peace (on Russian terms) are actually the pawns of the larger scheme. And what is this scheme? Why, world domination, of course. And the irony here is that the Russians themselves are the first victims of this plan to enslave mankind. Yet, to all earthly appearances, it is the Siberian Tiger who will apparently be the Administrator of this Gulag-to-be.

And from an ironic perspective, who better to play this part of warden-and-prisoner in one? After all, Russia has been the poster child for both victim and victor in these last hundred years. Any objections to this thought? I thought not. So where does this leave us? On Mt. Olympus, of course. Directly across from Mt. Athos.

Yes, that’s where I’m going. To the forbidden land. The land that is verboten to all rationalists and empiricists. The land forbidden to all the children of The Enlightenment. The land that Vladimir Solovyev and Peter Chaadaev mocked. The land enshrouded in the ancient mists of Time. The Land of the gods. Yes, I can hear the howls already. Are you afraid to go with me? Are you afraid of the dark? How about dark energy?

But let’s take a moment first, and do a little Kabbalistic mind experiment. You do know what Kabbalah is, correct? Talmudic Jewish practical magic? And you do know the heart of it, eh? No? Let me explain. Here it is, in a nutshell. Kabbalah is the means by which your desires are justified by your logic. In short, desires dictate your logic. And what is the desire? Well, we’ll get to that. But first, let’s follow the trail, although I’m getting ahead of myself here. Although it will be necessary in order to alleviate the vertigo that will result from this explanation. Have a drink of Port to wash it down. It helps. Really.

So here is the pedigree. The Kabbalistic (Talmudic) Jews that survived the Fall of the Temple infected the Khazars in the 600’s. They in turn, after their conversion to Kabbalistic Judaism, infected the Eastern Catholics (the Orthodox) who then became un-Orthodox under the Great Schism instigated by Photius. Patriarch Photius, you may recall, was the Usurper of the See of Constantinople. He was known to the Emperor Michael III as ‘Photius the Khazar-faced’ before Emperor Basil I deposed him for seeking to seize the throne. But don’t take my word for it. Read The Thirteenth Tribe by Arthur Koestler, who was Jewish, of course. Photius, I contend, is the Odysseus of our time. The world’s greatest liar. No one else comes close.

Now the original Kabbalistic infection became more virulent amongst the Post-Photian Orthodoxi (but who were no longer orthodox) with the introduction and acceptance of the Hesychast Doctrine of Gregory of Palamas in the 1350’s. This was followed by the infection of the Slavs who had intermarried with the Byzantine Emperors from the time of Vladimir the Great (circa 988) until the fall of Constantinople in 1453. And having adopted the Imperial Byzantine mantle, these Slavic Russians naturally adopted its twin, the Orthodox faith. Which, by this time, was no longer orthodox. Finally, to complete the circle, the sleeping Slavs (Russians) who were numb to the world due to the adoption of the Hesychastic dream-state, allowed these same Kabbalistic Khazarian Krack-heads to run rampant throughout the Empire. And what were they doing as they ran amok? They were selling the idea that Orthodoxy was frozen in time, and that only a repudiation of Orthodoxy could save Russia from both the slavery to Western Capitalism and the paralysis of Eastern Shamanism (a.k.a. Hesychasm). And truth be told, they were absolutely right. Unfortunately, like Mr. Gower, they bottled the wrong medicine. The name for their prescription was Marxism. Most political pathologists in academia today say that it took 74 years for the first dose to wear off, when the USSR supposedly fell in 1991. I disagree. I say, in agreement with Anatoly Golitsyn, that it wore off in 1953. When Uncle Joe, the Bonapartist hijacker of The Revolution died. Or was murdered.

Either way, the rest of the Politburo knew it was in trouble. And so, they abandoned the Marxist materialistic approach to world domination and reverted to the Kabbalistic approach of their spiritual forefathers, the Talmudic Turks known as the Khazars. But in the typical Russian way, the wily fellows who sat in the Politburo (led by Komrade Khrushchev) didn’t bother to tell the rest of the Communist world about their reversion to the practical magic of the Rabbis. No, they decided that they would take those other idiot Marxists along for the ride of achieving Tikkun Olam. The healing of the World. Russian style, of course.

And of course, if you’ve shifted from Wrath to Deceit as your new operating system, you’ll need to have the proper camouflage. The proper bag to house that cat. Designer bags work best for deceiving women, by the way. Ask those fellows at Coach. So the beautiful mask of Orthodoxy would be the perfect vehicle to fool the effeminate West anew, whereas the Spartan mask of Marxism was still operative within the Communist world of the former empire of the USSR.

So each mask has its purpose, and each is used where appropriate. And both of these masks continue to cover the reality of the Russian Cosmists who are at the heart of Russian philosophy and identity for the last 200 years. And while these Russian Cosmist chauvinists of any stripe seek to ‘heal the world’, they don’t seek to do it through Mosaic Jewish belief. Instead, they will use the Talmudic tricks of the Kabbalistic Jews to promote the inherent (as they see it) goodness of the Russian people and land. Holy Mother Russia. They don’t call it that for nothing. Meditate on that, if you would. Seriously.

And now we’re back where we started. Is there any possibility of such a conspiracy that has somehow wended its way from the time of the Khazars until now? And that the specifics of the final moves could have been hammered (and sickled) out back in 1959, fooling both the Capitalists and the Communists alike? Yes, but even Golitsyn didn’t see this part coming. Because, like most people, he thought the real battle was between political systems, and not religious systems.

And like most men, Golitsyn didn’t realize that the ultimate battle of religious systems is not between different men and their conception of who God is. No, the real battle is still the first battle—the battle to define who is not God. It is the battle between the gods and The God. Never forget the gods! Especially Perun. And who better to concoct such a scheme than the gods? After all, their conspiracy doesn’t have to be multi-generational. Because the gods don’t die, do they? But who, in this day and age, can believe in such things as the gods? Only idiots like me, I suppose. But that’s OK, I like solitude. And cats.

Let’s get back to the story. The story of Kabbalah. Let’s look at how it works. The operative principle is this: backwards, sideways, inside out, upside down, until you get where you want to go. Huh? What’s that mean? Well, it’s simple, once you know the underlying principle, which is this: semantics is everything.

I know, I sound totally incoherent to the modern mind. But remember this; when you adopt and use the modern mindset, you have cut yourself off from all of the past. You have rejected all of the good and evil of the past. When you call yourself ‘modern’, you have become orphaned. You know nothing before the coming of The Beatles. You are a cipher. A tabula rasa, a total blank, ready to be written upon by any hand. And there are many hands willing to fill your mnemonic void. Most of them are evil. And that too is a verboten thought. More dark energy.

Well then, what about the Kabbalistic mind experiment? How does it work? Quite simple, cousin. Take a word, any word, and begin to shuffle the letters around, and see what you get. What? Why would anyone do that? Patience, friend. Remember when I said semantics is everything? Here’s what I meant. There was a beginning to everything. There has to have been. Otherwise, if everything has always existed, it will also always exist. And in the same fashion as today. Which is to say, in an insane manner of existence. That is what we have today, correct? You don’t propose to say that this world we live in makes any sense do you? Not apart from some cosmic, supernatural purpose? Don’t tell me there is a final purpose to life if everything has always existed and always will. Don’t make me laugh at you!

Now if there was a beginning, there must have been a cause. Briggs can tell you that. And if there was a cause, it must have been either good or bad. Oh, sure, if you want we can include the idea that there could have been a ‘so-so’ cause, one that was neither good or bad. But tell me then, where did the concepts of good and bad come from if that was the case? Yes, I thought so. So let’s get back to my construct. It’s either good or bad. And if the beginning was bad, how has the idea of good come to be? Evil would never allow the concept of goodness to arise within its semantic reign. But goodness would allow this possibility of evil to occur. That’s the whole point of free will. You can choose between good and evil. That is the true meaning of freedom. But that choice is never allowed in the Gulag.

I know, I know, you think I’m wandering. Maybe I am, but the Jews did it for 40 years. I’ve only done it for a few minutes. You’re so impatient! All right then, here we go. If there was a beginning, and it was bad, it will always stay bad, Komrade. If you don’t believe me, just step out of line in the Gulag and see what happens. But if the beginning was good, then it would be powerful enough to allow us to err, and yet find our way back. Free will and repentance. And so, things can theoretically end well. Unless we are all idiots, all of the time. And by the way, I too am an occasional idiot. But not today.

And then what? How then did the beginning take place? What set all of this in motion? Where has all of the cosmos come from? Never mind for the moment where it is going. Where was its source? Here it is: semantics. Words, with rational meaning. In the beginning was The Word.


  1. Hoyos

    It bothers me a little that this made sense to me.

    In the Timeless Christian, EVKL writes about the devil as if he were real. Something few to no influential conservative, supposedly Christian in many cases, writers do. It makes a lot of sense that men who share the same spirit will coordinate unknowingly with each other, whether that spirit is good or evil. No secret meetings of Local 322 of the Grand Union of Malefactors required.

  2. Gary

    Has not and will not the earthly struggle always be between Isaac and Ishmael?

  3. Ken

    RE: “Where was its source? Here it is: semantics. Words, with rational meaning. In the beginning was The Word.”

    ACTUALLY, it was/is the Logos. “Logos” has been garbled in translation into “word” (or “The Word”); the meaning of Logos doesn’t neatly translate.

    “Logos does not mean anything remotely related to “semantics” or “words with rational meaning” in the sense of something found in a dictionary or grammar class as I. Watt so absurdly states. In religious references where “The Word” is used, the meaning remains Logos.

  4. Of course Satan is real. He might not be materially in existence, but exist he does. He is a species of Man, after all, as are the other non-material species of Men, also known as angels. Satan is the biggest liar of them all, deceiving himself first then others.

    No there are no gods, there is He that Is and everything else that has life got it from Him. Within that life, there are material forms and non-material forms. For the species Man, those are Angels and Humans, as far as we know.

    Then again, I don’t call myself Modern, so maybe there’s that.

  5. oldavid

    Well done again, Lanto.

    You have provided more thought-provoking another view without resorting to the silly clichés of the Bible-Bashers.

    I quite agree that the conspiracy germs you mentioned are but arms or tentacles of the real monster who’s ultimate intent is to steal as much as possible of Creation from its rightful owner and King.

    However, you seem to infer that evil (or bad, in your narrative) is some “stuff” that prowls around imposing itself. I suggest, for your consideration, that evil is simply the negation of some due good; much as darkness is the lack of light, cold is the lack of heat.

    I look forward to more of your interesting views.

  6. Jim S

    The above reminds me of Eco’s Foucault’s Pendulum. Very entertaining piece of fiction.

  7. Is this article supposed to be satire? If so, it doesn’t succeed in being either amusing, believable or informative.

  8. oldavid


    Let’s you-an’-me argue about “Black Holes” eh, Bob?

  9. neal

    Well, it is not the gods that introduced evil into the foundations of the world. Extreme sensitivity to initial conditions, with a watcher.

    Now, if that watcher was a demigod with rights of access, and a curiousity of what happened, that solves the grandfathering paradox.

    Chicken and egg stuff. Heal the world, break the world. Loopy
    in a roundabout way.

    Those ones that guard the Garden are initial constants, and energize when confronted with pathogens.
    And here are. Kind of a standoff.

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