Feigned Surprises of the Week: Journolist and Our New Tax

Said the main-stream journalist on Journolist, “If they of the right wing don’t behave and treat our Golden Boy properly, we’ll call them racists. It matters not whom we pick to cast this dreaded appellation upon. We merely need distract them with persiflage.”

“See!” said the conservative journalist. “Main-stream reporters are nothing more than extensions of the Democrat party!”

Said the One in Glory, “Our mandate that people buy health insurance from a list of approved companies (whose executives are party members), is not a tax. Let not your heart be troubled that I must call it a ‘tax’ in court.”

“See!” said the conservative journalist. “They’re finally admitting it’s a tax!”

Said the left-wing producer of a show purporting to be unbiased, “What I hate about conservatives is that they are all fascists. Fox News is their organ. The government should use its mighty powers to ban Fox, lest people be confused by its broadcasts.”

“See!” said the conservative journalist. “It is one more instance of the pot calling the kettle black!”

Said our Lawyer in Chief, “White people are cowards on the subject of race. For this reason, I cannot bring myself to prosecute a non-white man who threated to brain ‘crackers’ at the voting booth.”

“See!” said the conservative journalist. “This administration has race on the brain!”

Said the feminist reporter, “That Sarah Palin. How I hate her. She is no woman. In her vast and monumental ignorance, she has turned ‘choice’ into a mockery and actually chose to keep her damaged child. Do not mention her lack of experience, lest our enemies recall suddenly that the One is even less equipped from the wisdom of trials.”

“See!” said the conservative journalist. “Pro-choice has always meant killing fetuses for the sake of convenience! They finally admit that Governor Palin knew how to run a government!”

Ah, it’s been a lovely week for conservatives, a time for them to wallow in glorious and well deserved indignation. All that they have predicted has come to pass, everything that they have feared has been proved true.

Employees of main-stream media companies really are active and tireless agents for Democrats. Reporters and producers really do spin their news in ways they feel are most favorable to their chosen causes. Leftists really are blind to their inherent fascistic tendencies when they seek to silence their enemies through unconstitutional legal means.

The Obama-Pelosi health-care mandate really is a tax; it really will benefit insurance companies willing to submit themselves to government—that is, Democrat—control. The current administration, and much of the left wing, really does have race on the brain; progressives really are unable to see the world except through colored glass. And “pro-choice” has really always meant unquestioning support for eugenical abortion.

Oh, the sputtering from conservatives after this tumultuous week! Troll the blogs and you will find hosts of people besides themselves with righteous anger shouting, “See! See!” There are hundreds of I-told-you-so articles, endless discussion. But what have we learned from the Jourolist, health care Court brief, and New Black Panther revelations?


We know this because conservatives are shouting, “I told you so!” And if they can say that, they must have already known that the alleged perfidious activities of their enemies were true. And since they already knew that, and the people they are telling they already knew that also already knew that, they are doing nothing but wasting their energy.

The mistake conservatives make is to react to pathetic feints, to wrongly assume that the mock blows of the left are the main attack. Thus, when a leftist reporter says, “Since you are for limited government, you are a racist”, it is foolish to respond to the ridiculous accusation, because the moment you even deny such idiocies, you are sunk.

Because while you are distracted in proclaiming your obvious innocence, he is moving behind the scenes to implement his plans. You will have missed your chance to explain why limited government is superior.

Ignore taunts and asinine questions—just as your opponents ignore logic and sidestep pertinent questions. Pretend you never heard them and spend your time speaking the truth. And stop wasting all your time shouting, “See! See!”

Said Prime Minister Robert Peel, “But after this natural burst of indignation, no man of sense, courage, or prudence will waste his time or his strength in retrospective reproaches or repinings.”


  1. PJ

    Oh how I long for a day when America could actually have a conservative party rather than the agglomeration of religious fundamentalists and plutocratic clowns that try to pass themselves off as such.

    As it stands we have a Christian Democratic/Socialist coalition that runs against the cast-offs from an especially paranoid and/or sociopathic loony-bin. Nary an ounce of sanity to be found anywhere.

  2. Briggs


    We need more conservatives in the style of Burke. Where are they?

  3. PJ

    Too busy spinning in their graves I reckon.

  4. Ari


    “When you say “radical right” today, I think of these moneymaking ventures by fellows like Pat Robertson and others who are trying to take the Republican party and make a religious organization out of it. If that ever happens, kiss politics goodbye.”

  5. Interesting. Matt posits “Don’t sweat the small stuff”. We immediately begin tearing each other apart over small stuff.

    Matt: Please don’t tell us to stay out of shark-infested waters, or we’ll be doomed.

  6. PJ

    49er or maybe the sharks eventually starve?

  7. Doug M

    Where did we go off track?

    In the Eighties, the ‘social conservatives’ and the ‘fiscal conservatives’ were able to overlook their differences, in an alliance against socialism.

    By the Nineties, even the socialists had given up on socialism. The Freidmanites had won. The era of big government was over. We ended welfare as we knew it. We killed subsidies and tariffs. Free trade for everybody!

    Without a common enemy, the Republicans got lost. The ‘compassionate conservatives’ didn’t want to starve the beast. They wanted to control the beast. They became their own enemy. Keynes was back. Deficits didn’t matter. Protect the steelworkers. Subsidize the farmers. Regulate public companies. Expand Government in reach and scope in a way that hadn’t been seen since the Sixties.

    Now we have Mr. Spread the wealth around. Maybe we get the government we deserve. Maybe, anyone capable of becoming President should be disqualified.

  8. Doug M

    Hmm. my post didn’t post…

    I won’t write it a 3rd time in case it comes back from the dead.

    On another subject, is there a modern corollary to Goodwin’s law? If a political discussion goes on long enough someone will charge ‘Racism’? And, whoever levies the charge first automatically loses?

  9. Briggs


    Sorry. That damn spam filter just can’t be taught.

  10. Speaking as a wingnut: We erroneously thought they would be better at hiding their prejudices.

  11. Rob

    @PJ 1:14pm

    All I can say is Amen brother!

  12. The Race card. The Fascist card. The Religion card. The Socialist card.

    The political dialog in this country has devolved to a flash card exercise suitable only for people with no more than a nursery school intelligence.

    If it isn’t already in the Deck of Gross Over-Simplifications, the concept cannot be raised or discussed. Only approved Dumbed Way Way Down flash cards are allowed.

    Nap time. Put your crayons down and lay down on your towel. No thumbsucking.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *