Since they are not born human, and therefore she wouldn’t be a cannibal if she consumed one, how many whites do you think Ashleigh The Lion (the name she gave to herself) ate to achieve her remarkable size?
Let us move Swiftly to answer this question. Yet as we do, we must first note there is a paradox hidden in the query. Americans, including non-human American whites, are fat. Perhaps not as blubberous as Ashleigh The Lion, whose efforts to pack on flesh are clearly in the award-winning category; but whites are fat nonetheless.
The paradox is that eating animal fat is good for you. Eating fat produces muscle and health. So if Ashleigh The Lion is eating whites, who are fat, why doesn’t she look healthy and beautiful? Why does she instead, with her pointer, look like a seaweed-covered narwhal after a year-long diet of pancakes that washed up on the beach weeks ago? Something is going on.
Now, much of that fat in the non-human whites is gained by eating sugar and soy-laced products. (This isn’t just an industrial fattening up process. They do this willingly, even eagerly.) This makes whites not only fat, but weak and slow and easy to catch (this hunter has been taking advantage of that fact).
It’s possible, of course, Ashleigh is discarding the fat of the whites she has captured and fleeced, eating only their lean flesh. This isn’t likely, though, because the fat is the most delicious part of beasts. It’s doubtful she’d forgo the best-tasting parts entirely.
This brings us to the most controversial point of this post. Could the fat in whites be retaining the soy and other strange chemicals used in their feed?
If so—hear me out, here—then Ashleigh is, in effect, eating the same diet as the non-human whites. Hence her monumental physique.
In the olden days, we’d say, then, that soy and strange chemicals were making Ashleigh fat. The implication being that being fat is unhealthy. But since the body positivity movement, this can no longer be said. Fat is every bit as healthy as unfat. At least, that’s what we have to say to avoid grief.
This brings us to the final heated question. Could it be the soy and strange chemical industry that is behind the fat positivity movement?
I don’t want to peddle a conspiracy theory, but think about it. Big Strange Soy (for short) makes a lot of product manufacturing feed for non-human whites. So far, no problem. Whites are animals, and there’s no cure for that condition, so, really, what’s the difference what they eat.
It’s also clear Ashleigh herds and fleeces non-human whites. Again, this is no problem. It’s impossible to do harm to animals. Last fact: Whites are fat because of Big Strange Soy. Ashleigh is fat because of her diet. This is also indisputable.
We can only conclude that eating non-human whites makes one fat. And, in spite of what we’re allowed or not allowed to say, being fat is not healthy.
In other words, Big Strange Soy is racist against Blacks.
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