I Am The Cause Of All Discrimination In The United States Of America

Today’s post is at Pajama’s Media, “The Cause of All Discrimination? Me: One man makes a shocking confession.

Logically, if there is discrimination, there must be discriminators and discriminatees. Who, then, are the vile discriminators? The newly released Census data can tell us.

Pajamas Media

The Census has released its figures. The latest count is 308,745,538 citizens living within these Disunited States. I say “Disunited” not to pun but because it is well-known that discrimination is rampant within our tumultuous borders. The problem is so awful and so sickeningly pervasive that we are anything but united.

Females of the opposite sex outnumber males by 51 to 49 percent. Females cannot discriminate, but can be discriminated against. This is true by law (in most localities). Thus, there are only 157,460,224 potential discriminators, all male.

The rest is here. It might be easier to answer comments there (thanks!).

Thanks to David Steinberg, editor at PJM.


  1. JH

    Wait a minute! There is the age discrimination against older, middle-aged job candidates. So, either you are both a discriminator and a discriminate. Or whatever.

  2. a jones

    The odd thing I am sure I have seen a similar piece of satire here in the UK some thirty or more years ago when thee was much political brouhaha over such things. But I cannot now recollect where or when: although i have a vague idea it may have been in the Times of London.

    Kindest Regards

  3. BobN

    What is a “Female of the opposite sex”? Sounds like a very confused (or confusing) person.

  4. BobN. Saw that too, but the original site was corrected so I suspect Matt posted here early on and what we see is a capture of that pre-edited text. In fact, it was probably taken in mid-edit because probably at one time it said “Members” instead of “Females”. Briggs always says he needs a full-time editor/spell checker/spelunker. Are you available?

  5. Kevin

    @a jones I saw this applied years ago to prove the proposition that “I am the only person doing any work, and that explains why I am so cranky.”

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