Scientists Now Insist Sun Rises In The West

Scientists Now Insist Sun Rises In The West

A group of New Physicists gathered out on the point the other morning, close by where I live. I get up pretty early (too early), and since not many do, I wondered what they were doing standing around in the dark.

I went over and introduced myself, which is how I learned they were New Physicists. One of them, a woman of moderate years, explained that they were waiting for the sun to rise so that they could take some measurements.

“But you’re facing the wrong way. East is the other direction.” I pointed over my shoulder.

She said, “No, West is the right direction. This is West.” There was a murmur of agreement.

“Oh, I see. You’re trying to see how the sun’s rising in the East affects something in West?” I swear I heard somebody whisper a word that, I promise, sounded like “Bigot.”

The lead woman sighed. “East is the direction assigned to the rising by the patriarchy.” She had evidently dealt with nosy people like myself before. “We let the sun decide for itself which direction it rises in.”

The woman who I thought said “Bigot” was staring hard at me after this, as if she was daring me to say something. I did.

“I get it. You mean words like east, west and so on are only cultural constructions. They could have been reversed—the words, I mean—if circumstances had been different. Or like how they say higashi in Japanese, whereas we say east.”

Lead Woman put a restraining hand on Staring Girl, who I could now see—the light was increasing—had blue hair. She was fuming. The men in the group began to back away. One
with a scraggly beard stepped out into the water. Which isn’t as warm as you’d like it this year.

“You’re trying to use language to obscure the fact that the sun,” Lead Woman said, “is one of an infinite variety of stars. They don’t fit in simple categories. They get to pick where they rise depending on how they were born. We don’t. You can’t force your binary thinking on stars. Stars aren’t binary.”

I reminded her some stars are said to be binary.

“Binary isn’t binary!” Her patience with me was ending. But she hadn’t given up on me yet. “You’re trying to use your bigoted perceptions on what the sun can do. That’s the old way of thinking. We now know that it’s best to let each star decide for itself which direction it rises.”

Yeah, I told her, but this one is going to rise over there. I pointed to the east.

“Risephobe!” shouted Blue Hair.

“She’s right,” said a skinny fat guy. “You can’t impose your judgement on the sun’s rising according to how the sun really is.”

But it will rise in the east, I told them.

“You don’t know what the science says,” says Skinny Fat. “What you’re talking about is the old outmoded science. We now know—we have sophisticated models to show this—that stars can rise in whatever direction that best describes their true being. We have to respect that.”

Well, sure, I said. On other planets, the stars could conceivably come up opposite of ours. That’s just the way the gravity, or whatever, worked out there. But it’s silly to say the stars on those planets “really” revolve around their stars opposite of how they actually rise. Anyway, this star, our sun, will rise over there.

“Risephobe!” Blue Hair’s repertoire was limited.

During all this it was getting lighter and lighter. The scientists saw this, too, and did their best to ignore me as they finished setting up their equipment. My delay cost them valuable time and they hurried at their tasks.

Now there was a breeze blowing from the north. It wasn’t a gale, you understand, but there were some decent sized waves coming in. No white caps or anything; just standard waves.

I kept my mouth shut and watched as they pointed everything they had west. I looked east and, sure enough, there was the sun, poking up on the horizon. I had begun to doubt myself, such was their ardency, so I confess this was a relief.

A couple of minutes later, the sun was full up. It was a brilliant day. It wasn’t too long before the sun glinted off a wave to the west.

One of the scientists looked up from his instrument and shouted, “I got it! I got it!”

They gabbled among themselves, but all took turns looking at me in triumph. I smiled at them, but said nothing as I went back in to get more coffee.

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  1. Johnno

    If Immanuel Velikovsky’s findings are right, the, or a sun of sorts, did rise in the West… once upon a time… Then some crazy things happened and it is what it is now.

    But at least he had something to show for it. And that was so very upsetting to the establishment, that they refused to even acknowledge he existed, let alone address his work. So that is why many suspect he was on to something…

    Wokies probably nevet heard of him, and once they do, they’d be left frightened of its implications.

  2. Gail Finke

    “I reminded her some stars are said to be binary.” — That one made me laugh out loud.

  3. dave aora

    The parody doesn’t work because they denied the sun rises at all already and gave us fake cgi “photos” of earth from “space” to “prove” it. Because they are fake and gay just like space.

  4. pebird

    Don’t get me started about black holes.

  5. Hagfish Bagpipe

    Fine comedy — crazy, true, and very funny, like a scene from Briggs’ Adventures in Wonderland.

  6. L Ron Hubbard alias John B()

    The actual game of Mahjong (not the Solitaire games), has players listed in the following diagram:

    . . . . . North
    . . . . . . . |
    East . . -|- . . . West
    . . . . . . . |
    . . . . . South

    It also reflects the directions of star maps from the Earth

    My suspicion is that Mahjong was all about a battle in the heavens between gods and such

  7. Vermont Crank

    If Immanuel Velikovsky’s findings are right..

    Johnno reads Culture Wars 🙂

    I really enjoyed this post, Briggs. Bravo. This blog is must read for me every day. Thank you.

    I’d love to be at some press conference where a scientist was expostulating about this or that and ask him to explain what really was happening, scientifically, when God cursed the sun to stop its movement.

    O. and the Black Hole Thing. I heard what’s-his-face showed up at a Bunsen Burner Boys Bash gooned on Tequila and admit “ I made that who thing up

  8. Vermont Crank

    God caused, not curse; (although that nearly fits what happened 🙂

  9. Darren

    The sun rises where it chooses to. If for some reason someone chooses to perceive it wrong then let them. It is not worth arguing with the ignorant. Much like the entertaining flat earthers we just need to laugh to ourselves and let them be wrong.

  10. Jan Van Betsuni

    Credit for knowing Sunrise occurs in the morning.

  11. Zundfolge

    Its hard to believe that it’s been 15 or more years since Evan Sayet gave his “How modern liberals think” speech … but how right he was (and is). To these fools indiscriminateness is the only moral path because “discrimination” is the greatest evil.

    They must side with wrong over right, evil over good and the behaviors that lead to failure over the behaviors that lead to success or they will have engaged in discrimination (which they now call “white supremacist” or “colonizer” thinking).

    Their entire world view REQUIRES that they always be wrong. At this point I think its safe to never enter a multi story structure that was built after say 2016 or so since it was likely designed by an “Engineering Studies” major, and not an actual engineer.

  12. Cary Cotterman

    Vermont, you’re using silly fiction to comment on silly fiction about people who believe in silly fiction. Transcendent irony.

  13. Vermont Crank

    Josue 10: Ver. 12. Them. This may be considered as a canticle of victory, containing a fervent prayer, which was presently followed with the desired effect. — Aialon. Heb. “Sun, in Gabaon, be silent; (moved not) and thou, moon, in the valley of Aialon,” or “of the wood,” which was probably not far from Gabaon. Josue had pursued the enemy at mid-day, to the west of that city, when turning round, he addressed this wonderful command to the sun. It is supposed that the moon appeared at the same time. But the meaning may only be, that the sun and the course of the stars should be interrupted for a time. C. — The sun and the moon stood still in their habitation. Heb. iii. 11. M. — Many have called in question this miracle, with Maimonides, or have devised various means to explain it away, by having recourse to a parhelion or reflection of the sun by a cloud, or to a light which was reverberated by the mountains, after the sun was set, &c. Prœdam iv. 6. Spinosa, Grotius, Le Clerc. — But if these authors believe the Scriptures, they may spare themselves the trouble of devising such improbable explanations, as this fact is constantly represented as a most striking miracle. If S. Paul (Heb. xi. 30,) make no mention of it, he did not engage to specify every miracle that had occurred. He does not so much as mention Josue, nor the passage of the Jordan, &c. so that it is a matter of surprise that Grotius should adduce this negative argument, to disprove the reality of the miracle. C. — The pretended impossibility of it, or the inconvenience arising to the fatigued soldiers from the long continuance of the day, will make but small impression upon those who consider, that God was the chief agent; and that he who made all out of nothing, might easily stop the whole machinery of the world for a time, and afterwards put it in motion again, without causing any derangement in the different parts. C. — It is not material whether the sun turn round the earth, or the contrary. H. — The Hebrews generally supposed that the earth was immovable; and on this idea Josue addresses the sun. Philosophers have devised various intricate systems: but the Scripture is expressed in words suitable to the conceptions of the people. The exterior effect would be the same, whether the sun or the earth stood still. Pagan authors have not mentioned this miracle, because none of the works of that age have come down to us. We find, however, that they acknowledged a power in magic capable of effecting such a change.

    Cessavere vices rerum dilataque longa,

    Hæsit nocte dies: legi non paruit æther,

    Torpuit & præceps audito carmine mundus.

    Lucan, Phars. vi. See Odys. xii. 382. and xxiii. 242.

    This miracle would not render Josue superior to Moses, as some have argued. For all miracles are equally impossible to man, and equally easy to God: the greatness of a miracle is ot a proof of greater sanctity. C. — Aialon lay to the south-west of Gabaon. H. — Josue ordered the moon to stop, as a necessary consequence of the sun’s standing still. God condescended to grant his request. W.

    Gary, Judging Divine Revelation to be fiction pleases Satan and his scientism world. As for myself, I know what is real and what is fiction and the enlightenment gainsaying of truth is the strongest and most fetid fiction possible.

    After the age of faith, science successfully sued for divorce from Sacred Theology and began to fornicate with the harlots of the enlightenment and produced innumerable bastard children us Faithful are expected to adopt as legitimate children of progress.

    Not me.

    I trust Divine Relation and laugh at “science” as it produces materialistic “explanations” for miracles and I find it quite amusing that men of faith are excepted by the smart set to be shamed by scientism and its prideful pretensions.

  14. C-Marie

    First: “1Now after the death of His servant Moses, the LORD spoke to Joshua son of Nun, Moses’ assistant, saying, 2“Moses My servant is dead. Now therefore arise, you and all these people, and cross over the Jordan into the land that I am giving to the children of Israel.

    3I have given you every place where the sole of your foot will tread, just as I promised to Moses. 4Your territory shall extend from the wilderness and Lebanon to the great River Euphrates—all the land of the Hittites—and west as far as the Great Sea.a

    5No one shall stand against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, so will I be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you.b

    6Be strong and courageous, for you shall give these people the inheritance of the land that I swore to their fathers I would give them.

    7Above all, be strong and very courageous. Be careful to observe all the law that My servant Moses commanded you. Do not turn from it to the right or to the left, so that you may prosper wherever you go. 8This Book of the Law must not depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. For then you will prosper and succeed in all you do.

    9Have I not commanded you to be strong and courageous? Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1.

    Now read what happens later: “5So the five kings of the Amorites—the kings of Jerusalem, Hebron, Jarmuth, Lachish, and Eglon—joined forces and advanced with all their armies. They camped before Gibeon and made war against it.

    6Then the men of Gibeon sent word to Joshua in the camp at Gilgal: “Do not abandon your servants. Come quickly and save us! Help us, because all the kings of the Amorites from the hill country have joined forces against us.”

    7So Joshua and his whole army, including all the mighty men of valor, came from Gilgal.

    8The LORD said to Joshua, “Do not be afraid of them, for I have delivered them into your hand. Not one of them shall stand against you.”

    9After marching all night from Gilgal, Joshua caught them by surprise. 10And the LORD threw them into confusion before Israel, who defeated them in a great slaughter at Gibeon, pursued them along the ascent to Beth-horon, and struck them down as far as Azekah and Makkedah.11As they fled before Israel along the descent from Beth-horon to Azekah, the LORD cast down on them large hailstones from the sky, and more of them were killed by the hailstones than by the swords of the Israelites.

    12On the day that the LORD gave the Amorites over to the Israelites, Joshua spoke to the LORD in the presence of Israel:

    “O sun, stand still over Gibeon,
    O moon, over the Valley of Aijalon.”b
    13So the sun stood still
    and the moon stopped
    until the nation took vengeance
    upon its enemies.c
    Is this not written in the Book of Jashar?d

    “So the sun stopped
    in the middle of the sky
    and delayed going down
    about a full day.”e
    14There has been no day like it before or since, when the LORD listened to the voice of a man, because the LORD fought for Israel. Joshua 10.

    The Lord God is the Creator of All and He will do as He wills. Perhaps pray for those misguided people.

    God bless, C-Marie

  15. Michael Ozanne

    The Sun doesn’t “rise” as such, the apparent horizon falls away from it as the Earth rotates… 😛

    To find a place where the Sun does indeed “rise” in the West all they have to do is change where they’ve set their instruments… to Venus which rotates the other way. Something to be encouraged…

  16. Mark Luhman

    Michael Ozanne We really need to do that and tell the the heat of Venus is a construct of dead white men.

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