Pope To Critics: You Are Literally Ecocidal Hitlers

Pope To Critics: You Are Literally Ecocidal Hitlers

Da Pope:

According to Pope Francis, acts such as the massive pollution of air, land and water resources, large-scale destruction of flora and fauna, and any action capable of producing an ecological disaster or destroying an ecosystem should be regarded as “ecocidal” and must not go unpunished.

In this regard, he recalled the Synod for the Panamazon Region, which proposed to define an act or omission against God, against one’s neighbour, the community and the environment, as “ecological sin”.

Toss half your uneaten kale salad into the bin, or fly to a vacation destination, and so increase your carbon footprint, and it’s six years solitary for you. Homicidal crimes, on the other stalk, should not be punished, at least not capitally. Not even if the murderer is good at his job and offs dozens, or more than dozens, of real actual human beings. Not even if he slits their throats, rapes their corpses, and mutilates their remains.

We are now, collectively as a species, more “moral” than to desire punishment. We no longer need to mete out justice to such fiends. The death penalty is “inadmissible.”

“Briggs, you know as well as I the Pope’s not calling for punishing people for, say, breeding like rabbits.”

Well…

“You know what I mean. He means groups, like Apple corporation, who create giant lakes of toxic heavy metal waste in their manufacture of the latest must-have electronic toys on which our modern economy depends.”

He’s got a point about that. Maybe we could make Tim Cook swim across one of these lakes—call it an i-lap—to prove his dedication to the cause of putting a thinking suppression device in every hand.

“Maybe I’m wrong about Apple. They’re enlightened in so many other ways. Best to leave them alone. Think about what Fr Martin would say. There has to be balance, you know.”

Like Cardinal Cupich saying his parishioners should only eat bugs sucked through paper straws else they are in mortal sin?

“Exactly like that. Animal meat is sacred.”

I’m sure you’re right. But who exactly decides just what a “sin against ecology” is? I mean, I know what worshiping graven images is.

“Disrespecting Pachamama might be an eco-sin because of the climate change denial implications.”

You have a point because, as the Pope said, those kind of environmental slights have a “serious tendency to degenerate into a culture of hatred.”

“There is nothing worse than hatred. Which is why the Pope rightly hates it.”

Darn right, he does. I know he’s mad not enough people are taking eco-sin seriously. Instead, they’re condemning sins that cry out to Heaven for vengeance, like sodomy.

“Give it up, Briggs. Nobody cares about poopdick anymore. Let people do what they want.”

I’m not stopping anybody from doing anything. How can I?

“You’re rants are exactly why the Pope calls people like you literally Hitler.”

He does?

“Yes. He said ‘politicians who rage against homosexuals, gypsies and Jews remind him of Hitler.'”

Without Jews, fags, and gypsies, there would be no theater.

What did you say!?

Nothing. Just quoting Mel Brooks. But did the Pope really say I’m literally Hitler?

“You bet he did. He said ‘It is not coincidental that at times’ like these ‘there is a resurgence of symbols typical of Nazism.'”

Everybody knows Nazis are bad.

“The Pope said that when he hears speeches like you’re responsible for, he thinks of of ‘speeches by Hitler in 1934, 1936.'”

Before my time.

“There’s more. He said ‘With the persecution of Jews, gypsies, and people with homosexual tendencies, today these actions are typical (and) represent par excellence a culture of waste and hate. That is what was done in those days and today it is happening again.'”

So being against sodomy is just like littering on a massive scale?

“It’s a whole new category of crime. A ‘fifth category’, which are ‘crimes against peace’.”

That sounds pretty serious. I had no idea that condemning what God Himself condemns, and what the Church herself has always condemned, would be a Hitlerian sin.

“That’s why you have me around. To keep you straight. I’m warning you that if you keep it up, you will be shown no mercy.”

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15 Comments

  1. I congratulate the current anti-pope on his continued exemplary conduct. He is showing people the darkness, that they may more easily find the light, the truth, and the way.

    I congratulate the College of Cardinals for hiring him, and not dismissing him. They are an example to us all, and their names should be specially noted for posterity.

  2. Michael Dowd

    “pope” has Democrat talking points down real good. Surely he will be endorsing one of them for President, helping fund the campaign, and probably swing through for in person support. The “pope” is hot. Face it.

  3. Gary

    <i<“Exactly like that. Animal meat is scared.”

    Heh. Who isn’t?

  4. Amateur Brain Surgeon

    According to Pope Francis, acts such as the massive pollution of air, land and water resources, large-scale destruction of flora and fauna, and any action capable of producing an ecological disaster or destroying an ecosystem should be regarded as “ecocidal” and must not go unpunished.

    All “ecosystems” are fragile and because they arose from Mother Earth, Mother Earth is guilty of creating a touchy and easily wounded series of cry-baby systems.

    Are volcanoes also a fragile ecosystem ?

    What about the International, intercontinental, racist hurricane attacks which originate in dark Africa and target us innocent white male heterosexual Floridian Christians of European descent innocently living in the sixth borough of New York where one has to go north to get to the south?

    What about us innocent white never-owned-a-slave Christian men and yet are constantly targeted by African-Generated Harricains (that’s how Crackers pronounce it)?

    A lot of us used to contribute to Peter’s Pence but now we are sitting on our wallets because you are not the Vicar of Christ teaching and defending the Original Deposit of Faith but, rather, you are a servant of the United Nations trying to cut a deal with those dog-eating dictators, rapists, insane animists, pedophiles, and free-lunch liars so y’all can carve-up the jungle into some cockamamie zones and make some cash from companies that desire to work there.

  5. Sheri

    Wow, the Catholic Church outdid itself on this destructive false prophet. (Which I think makes it a faux church now since it keeps the false prophet around.)

    Maybe we could punish murderers by forcing them to grow kale with manual farm equipment and only feed them kale. Good for the planet, though it used to fall under “cruel and unusual” punishment.

    “Animal meat is sacred”???? Rewrote the Bible, too, I see. This dude is one busy false prophet.

  6. Ye Olde Statistician

    Sometimes it’s hard to tell what the Pope said versus what the secular media thinks he said.

    Also, there may be a fine distinction to be made between ‘sodomy’ and ‘homosexual inclinations’ that enable one to hate the sin while still loving the sinner.

  7. Sander Van Der Wal

    The Pope is not old enough to remember those speeches as they were delivered. So, he either heard them much later, or this is a figure of speech.

    Apparently he has the time to watch The Discovery Channel’s Hitler Weeks ( like shark week, but with hitler instead of sharks).

  8. Richard A

    YOS: Nah. I’m done with agonizing over how to avoid unjust discrimination against homosexuals. I expect him to lay out a comprehensive program of just discrimination.

  9. Jorge Cerra

    With the instatement of the new sin, instructions will be necessary, among others, to know the difference between venial farting and mortal farting.

  10. Dan

    Michael, you are absolutely correct. Francis will likely endorse a Democratic presidential candidate soon. My money is on Pete Buttigieg!

  11. C-Marie

    Thank you, Matt. Great article!! We can only sin against God and mankind…..not against things or animals…..but we can sin against God and people by extreme misuse of environment, things, and animals. There is no such thing as “ecological sin.”

    From Ye Olde Statistician: Also, there may be a fine distinction to be made between ‘sodomy’ and ‘homosexual inclinations’ that enable one to hate the sin while still loving the sinner.”

    Agreed, we are to hate the sin and love the sinner ….. by most, the following inclinations are chosen ones and are not considered a Part of a person’s make-up of their humanity:

    Adultery ….. stop looking and work on your own marriage.
    Thievery ….. stop coveting and earn your living.
    Drunkenness ….. stop to remember that you are the temple of the Living God.
    Murderous ….. stop and forgive with Jesus’ forgiveness.
    Fornication ….. stop and remember that you are the temple of the Living God.

    But concerning same sex inclinations ….. officialdom believes these are one’s condition ….. accept that is how you are ….. live chastely ….. and ….. apparently officialdom believes this particular inclination of same sex attraction, is built into those who have these inclinations, for according to Pope JPII’s catechism, to which the understanding is, that he gave his approval, is stated:

    “2358 The number of men and women who have deep-seated homosexual tendencies is not negligible. This inclination, which is objectively disordered, constitutes for most of them a trial. They must be accepted with respect, compassion, and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided. These persons are called to fulfill God’s will in their lives and, if they are Christians, to unite to the sacrifice of the Lord’s Cross the difficulties they may encounter from their condition.
    2359 Homosexual persons are called to chastity. By the virtues of self-mastery that teach them inner freedom, at times by the support of disinterested friendship, by prayer and sacramental grace, they can and should gradually and resolutely approach Christian perfection.”

    BUT, the truth is that this inclination is not anyone’s created sexuality, it is a counterfeit to God’s creation of sexuality of male and female. This inclination is either caused by emotional wounds from childhood which move one to seek another of the same sex of the one to who caused the woundings, or is an agreement with temptation to experiment.

    The Pope and Bishops, and priests of the Catholic Church most likely know this, but to do something by the power of the Holy Spirit, using the gifts that He gave to the Catholic Church, like miraculous healings for these wounded people, would cause such a ruckus, public healings and miracles would upset the whole applecart!!

    Okay. Maybe some of the hierarchy do not know this, but those who truly have a relationship with Jesus Christ, I expect do know this, but perhaps have been warned to not move forwards with the truth for some reason, maybe exposure of ….. who knows.

    Exposure would definitely rile the devil up. Obviously there appears to be a deepseated culture around this. See who Pope Francis has surrounded himself with.

    And finally, the true Catholic Church will always be because Jesus said that He would be with us. “I will never leave you nor forsake you.”

    Free the same sex attracted people!!! Dear Bishops! Dear priests!!

    God bless, C-Marie

  12. Milton Hathaway

    I was raised Catholic, but I abandoned it decades ago. The turning point for me was fifth grade; specifically Sister Marcia. She confused the hell out of me. In hindsight, I think she was very confused herself – I heard years later that she had abandoned religious life, and went off to a foreign country to find herself, or whatever.

    Now when I was in Catholic school, the pope was a distant entity. The nuns may have tried to teach us about his pronouncements, but I have no memory of it; I’m sure it was well above our heads anyway.

    This pope reminds me of Sister Marcia, except multiplied ten-fold. The more I hear of his pronouncements, the more I wonder if he is the Vicar of an entity very different from Christ.

    You Catholics have my sympathies.

  13. Problem with religion is that is run by very old people that don’t really understand technology and how people use that technology in correlation with the rhetoric they use. So it is obvious they feel like digital critics are monsters cuz of the way they express their thoughts through memes.

  14. What a time to be alive. Pope being Pope, critics criticizing. They don’t go well with each other. We get news…

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