Canadian Health Minister Invents New Euphemism For Doctor Killings

Canadian Health Minister Invents New Euphemism For Doctor Killings

Canada’s Health Minister invented a new euphemism to describe doctors purposely killing their patients. That euphemism is relief.

Brilliant! Yes, it’s a riff on, or rip off, of Soylent Green. Whichever you prefer. Either way, you cannot but admire its power.

Have a pain? Seek relief. Cancer? Get some relief. Feeling blue? Nothing some Expert-certified Government-approved doctor-directed relief can’t fix.

Set up is this video, in which a reporter asks the Health Minister if it’s his intention to go ahead with MAiD for “mental illness.” MAID, if you have forgotten, stands for Murderous Assassins in Doctors, and is Canada’s Expert “solution” to health care.

A perfect utilitarian solution at that. NPR, the aural bible of the elite woke, says dying without the assistance of a medically trained assassin in a hospital will set you back to the tune of multiple tens of thousands of dollars. US dollars at that, which are mightier than loonies.

Look, you can either hook up some guy to a bank of machines for six weeks, which costs plenty. Or you have a doctor grab a bed pan and scalpel, which only costs the time of the orderly who cleans up the mess.

Incidentally, the Health Minister stressed there aren’t enough doctors to meet the demand of killing patients. Other than iatrogenically, the usual way. I mean on purpose. He said they have a “curriculum” and are running would-be assassins through it now. I bet the diagrams in the textbooks are wild.

Anyway, the Health Minister went on to say that folks “under their own recognizance say they want access to MAID.” He said—and here comes the euphemism, with my emphasis—“people ask for this relief.”

Relief! People are relieved to be dead at the hand of a doctor. People consent to doctors killing them. What moral truth is higher than consent?

Relief. Say. Maybe it won’t be scalpels. Maybe Pfizer or some other giant pharmaceutical is already selling pills for this. Gives new meaning to “Plop, plop, oh what a relief it is,” eh? If a reader knows, please clue us in. This is bound to be a huge growth area, and thus an excellent investment opportunity.

Feeling stressed? As your doctor if Reliefia is right for you.

The Minister also said that Canadians should have the “right” to be killed by a doctor. Since every right entails a duty on somebody’s part, the state feels compelled to fulfill this duty, as a second Expert in the video confirms. Hence that curriculum we mentioned. They will, we predict, sell this duty as being both compassionate and economicals.

Canadian Experts are taking their death duty seriously. They see what they have to do, and they are doing it. And they are forbidding anybody to criticize them about it. Which makes sense. After all, how can non-Experts, like you, dear reader, who do not have “degrees” or certifications in doctor killing, possibly offer anything pertinent? Best to shut people up.

Hence they are modifying the Criminal Code of the Great White North to make it a crime to meddle. It will now be illegal to engage

…in any conduct with the intent to provoke a state of fear in:

(a)?a person in order to impede them from obtaining health services from a health professional;

(b)?a health professional in order to impede them in the performance of their duties; or

(c)?a person, whose functions are to assist a health professional in the performance of the health professional’s duties, in order to impede that person in the performance of those functions.

Ten years in the hoosegow for you if you frighten your grandmother out of going to the hospital to have a doctor kill her. Harsh.

Gets depressingly monotonous in prison. After a couple of years suffering behind bars for your crime you might need to seek relief.

Incidentally, if you are in Canada and not feeling well, stay away from doctors. You never know when one might slip you the needle. To give you the “relief” you asked for. You’ll never know, not for sure, if your doctor wants to kill you because it’s best for you, or because it’s best for him. “We notice, Dr Smith, that your participation in MAID has been very low these last three months. Do we have a problem?”

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  1. > Maybe Pfizer or some other giant pharmaceutical is already selling pills for this.

    Barbiturates. They’ve been selling them for ages, mostly for anestesia. They also used to be used as anxiolitics in the fifties, but it was possible to overdose on them and commit suicide (or something that looks like suicide 😉 ). So they were mostly replaced by benzodiazepines in this role since benzodiazepines don’t kill people who overdose.

  2. Better yet, in some provinces, you’ll be afforded the opportunity to volunteer your corporeal shell to be cut up for spare parts. What will those Wacky Canadian Quackers think up next?

  3. That bill would also seem to open you up to prosecution for suggesting healthier options than whatever the medical system is currently pushing. Thinking about bariatric surgery? Your friend suggests a low carb diet and regular walks and points out that surgery comes with the possibility of complications? Criminal! Suggest that the Covid vax might not be safe because it has unknown side effects? Criminal!

    How, on the other hand, do you make someone fear being killed by a doctor if they want to be killed by a doctor? “Committing suicide is a mortal sin”? Make them fear by pointing out religious beliefs? But the politicians don’t believe in your religious beliefs. So is proselytizing a crime under this bill?

  4. Leonard

    I’m surprised they didn’t call it “Accelerated Hospice”.

  5. You might want to read this:

    Summary (from the site):
    “The methods used for mass extermination in the Nazi death camps originated and were perfected in earlier use against people with physical, emotional, and intellectual disabilities. This article describes the historical context of attitudes toward people with disabilities in Germany and how this context produced mass murder of people with disabilities prior to and during the early years of World War II. Several key marker variables, the manipulation of which allowed a highly sophisticated Western society to officially sanction the murder of people with disabilities, are examined. Important implications must continually be drawn from these sad events as we work with people with disabilities at the dawn of a new century.”

    Turns out lots of parents of damaged children (and guardians of crippled adults) found relief in having them killed.

  6. Hun

    It’s somewhat ironic that the biggest proponents of MAID are also vehemently opposed to death penalty for violent criminals. Isn’t that interesting?

  7. Cary D Cotterman

    “NPR, the aural bible of the elite woke, says dying without the assistance of a medically trained assassin in a hospital will set you back to the tune of multiple tens of thousands of dollars.”

    When my dad was down to his last couple of months before cancer was going to kill him, he took the economical way out. A .32 magnum cartridge goes for about fifty cents.

  8. john b()


    I just heard a story about a surgeon who had ‘them’ surgically break his back.

  9. How do you consistently write like this? Is it pure inspired genius?

  10. Rudolph Harrier

    Someday this will happen in Canada. It may have already happened in Canada.

    -Man claims to be woman. Says he must become woman, or else he’ll kill himself.
    -Government funds “sexual reassignment surgery” for him. They congratulate themselves for “saving a life.”
    -After man has mutilated his body to be a mockery of the female form, he is even more depressed.
    -Government has the cure: MAID
    -All other options for treatment are denied, since they would imply that maybe this guy shouldn’t have mutilated himself in the first place.
    -Government kills guy pretending to be woman. They congratulate themselves for “ending suffering.”

  11. gareth

    How about inheritance tax breaks for the family of folks who show social responsibility by MAIDing, rather than wasting medical care funding in deliberately clinging on to life? Maybe refunds on health insurance too? What good Canadian citizen would want to be a useless eater anyway?

  12. Johnno

    Actually Rudolph… it’s already happened, and…

    Get this!

    The post-op regretting trans-guy DOES NOT QUALIFY for the relief!

    Lol! Government has spoken! LoLoLoL!

    Alberta man denied euthanasia request after regretting gender mutilation surgery

    A gender-confused Alberta man who says his life has been irreversibly changed by genital surgery is upset that he has been denied medically assisted suicide.

    On July 26, a biological male calling himself Duchess Lois of Alberta announced that he was denied so-called Medical Assistance in Dying (MAiD), a euphemism used in Canada to indicate voluntary execution by a medical professional.

    Duchess Lois had applied for the lethal service in January on the grounds that his surgery had sterilized him and irreversibly changed his life.

    “I requested my MAiD file. A human rights concern?” he asked on a Twitter post after his doctor had denied the request, instead suggesting that the patient had a human rights concern.

    Lois has suggested that his status as a First Nations Canadian, his sterility, and his identity as a “transsexual woman” have bearing in his attempt to be euthanized.

    “I’m accessing M.A.I.D [sic] as a sterilized first nations person of treaty 6, who is also a post-op transsexual woman of 14 years,” he had previously announced in a January post.

    “I qualify for it as someone who is sterilized and who has undergone vaginoplasty,” he added “Two things that cannot be reversed or relieved.”

    The doctor concluded that Lois was not eligible for euthanasia but suggested that he visit a gender clinic in Montreal for a surgical follow-up. He also provided resources “for looking further into human rights concerns.”

    Lois was upset with this decision.

    “What resources did they give you?” asked a Twitter user apparently sympathetic to Lois’ quest. “It sounds like they think you have a human rights concern and provided you information to get your questions answered or something.”

    “No source,” Lois responded. “I’m supposed to be content with numbing cream that doesn’t work. Back to square one.”

    LoL! If you’re D.I.E. you are not allowed to DIE!

    If the government Expurt policy and health scare industry and cult of wokeness is directly responsible for your suffering, you are NOT ALLOWED to seek relief! Think of the Narrative! Think of the Message that sends! The Far Right will have a field day! That is intolerable! So live and suffer for the Cause!

    Anyway, I’m surprised they are having trouble recruiting for the Killing Teams. You’d have thought the abortionists would’ve lined up to double their customer base and even murder the wimen who regret murdering their child… Guess it’s time to lower standards again to get recruitment up… What a consolation that will be to the relief-asylum-seekers!

    But despite what Franky Bergolio says, there is a Hell, ladies and gentlemen, and it isn’t empty. Abandon Hope further than you already have if you’re taking this path! I say this to you now, before it is declared illegal to say so.

  13. Rudolph Harrier

    That’s slightly different from my scenario. In my scenario the guy doesn’t regret the surgery itself, but decides to 41% himself for the usual reasons that trannies do.

    The key difference is whether the government is forced to admit it did something wrong. For “Duchess Lois” to be killed, the government must admit that the surgery he received was in fact a mutilation, since he cites the negative effects of the mutilation as the reason he cannot keep living.

    But if he had instead expressed depression at being forced to live in such an intolerant world, one so intolerant that he remained depressed even after such a beautiful and life affirming thing as SRS, then I suspect they would have killed him.

    Note that a consequence of this viewpoint is that they are less willing to kill you the more that you say that their policies are making your life miserable.

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